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Western Mail, Thursday 21 December 1933, page 2
A GOOD PAIR.
The troops knew him as "Darkie." During his first few weeks at Broadmeadows Camp he managed to sample the majority of punishments for military crime. It was generally conceded that Darkie was a shard-doer."
Approaching his company commander, who had previously refused him embarkation leave, Darkie spun a pitiful yarn about his wife and children being sick, and how he had received a letter from his wife entreating him to come home. The captain, however, was by this time a "full wake up" to Darkie's stratagems. "I'm afraid I can't do that," said he. "I have received a letter from your wife also, and she asks me on no account to let you go borne. She said you get drunk, thrash the children, break all the household furniture, and ill-treat her shamefully."
Darkie looked astonished. He saluted and turned to go, but suddenly halted, and, addressing the captain, said: "Sir, can I speak to you-not m an officer, but as man to man!"
"Go ahead," said the captain.
"Well, what I'd like to say is this," said Darkie. "You and me are the two biggest flamin’ liars in this ruddy camp.
I'm not and never have been married!"
"J. Emma," Victoria Park.